Okay…take off your clothes then.”
Her eyes widened at his command, and she pressed her head hard into the pillow, trying to erase the sensation of Raza's lips on her. But he leaned in closer, and his lips brushed her throat once again.
He closed the distance between their bodies, planting a feathery kiss on her jaw, and she held her breath.
“Kya hua, bolti bohut jaldi band ho gai? Tumhe hi tho haq chahiye tha, ab de raha hun tho gadde mein gaayab hona chah rahi ho.”, he whispered in her ear, his breath grazing her skin and making goosebumps rise.
(What happened, cat got your tongue? You wanted the right, and now that I'm giving it to you,Now you're trying to disappear into the mattress?)
He released her hand and traced his fingers from her palm to her shoulder, enjoying her reaction.
Leaning down, he was about to press his lips to hers, but she turned her head to the right, and his kiss landed on her cheek. She shut her eyes tightly, her hand reflexively pressing against his chest.
And then, in that moment, time stilled as she felt his heartbeat racing just like hers. He instantly moved away, realizing she had sensed it too.
He sat up, ruffling his hair, his gaze wandering everywhere in the room but her.
Halima swallowed, looking at him. It was the first time both of them had felt this close to losing control. They sat in awkward silence, neither able to look at the other.
“Mujhe maaf kar do, mai behek gaya tha, mujhe pata nahi chala ye…kaise.”,he said, standing up.
(Forgive me, I lost control, I don't know how...)
She bit her lip, trying to speak, “W-Wo doodh rakha hai, thanda ho gaya hoga.”
(T-The milk is kept, it must have gone cold.)
He exhaled in relief at her words, turning to face her, “Issi liye keh raha tha, nahi seh paaogi tum, toh pehle hi kadam par dagmaga gai.”
(That's why I said, you wouldn't be able to handle it; you stumbled at the first step.)
He recalled the moment she turned her head, refusing to let him kiss her on the lips. His heart pounded with the conflict between his mind and his heart at that moment but when she put her han on his chest he was dragged out of haze.
“Aapka dil bohut tez dhadak raha tha…”, she mumbled, avoiding the subject of his earlier words.
(Your heart was beating so fast...)
“Kyu, tumhara nahi dhadak raha tha?”,he asked, not looking at her as he grabbed the glass.
(Why, wasn't yours racing too?)
“Maine toh sirf kaha tha haq chahiye… aapne hi toh kaha tha Mujhe haq hai, phir aap gussa ho gaye aur kehne lage ki mai apne kapde utaaroon.”,she spoke innocently, her expression now tinged with hurt.
(I only said I wanted my rights... you're the one who said I had the right, then got angry and told me to take off my clothes)
He walked toward her and held out the half-filled glass of milk, “Isse piyo...”
(Drink this...)
She took the glass, her hands still trembling. She started sipping, moving a little away from him as he sat down beside her.
He noticed but didn't say anything; he knew he'd made a mistake. How could a husband use such words in anger to his wife? It was vulgar.
“Accha, sorry yaar, galti ho gai. Tum toh meri choti si biwi ho, bohut pyaari ho, maan jaao na.”, he pleaded, glancing at her as she continued drinking the milk.
(Alright, sorry dear, I made a mistake. You're my little wife, very sweet; please forgive me)
She looked at him sideways and asked, “Ab gussa hai?”
(Are you still angry?)
“Tum gussa rehne deti ho?”, he shot back.
(Do you let me stay angry?)
She giggled like a child, handing him the milk, “Mera pet bhara hai, aap itna pee lein na.”
(I'm full; you drink the rest.)
He shook his head, marveling at how small her appetite was, drank the remaining milk, placed the glass on the table, and sat back down.
“Meri baat dhyaan se suno.”, he said, and she nodded eagerly.
(Listen to me carefully)
“Sach sach bataao ye haq wali patti kisne padhaai hai?”, he asked, taking her hand in his.
(Tell me honestly, who taught you this 'rights' talk?)
She swallowed, blinking her eyes, unsure whether to tell him or not.
“Amma ne aur Daddu ne bhi, aur Lajjo me bhi.”, she replied, and Raza felt like banging his head against the wall. Everyone around her had this backward mindset,then why won't she do this stupidity.
(My mother, my grandfather, and Lajjo too)
“Do logon ka toh samajh aaya, par Lajjo toh padhi likhi hai, wo aise bewakoofi kyu karne ko kahegi tumhe?”, he asked, suppressing his anger toward them.
(I understand the two, but Lajjo is educated, why would she encourage such foolishness?)
“Laaj ki amma hai na, unhone laaj ko sab bataya hai pehle se hi ki aage chal kar jab uski shadi ho toh usko koi pareshani na ho, usne kaha ki aapse apni patni hone ka adhikar maangun, aur Daddu ne kaha ki maine ghar chor diya hai aur meri jagah koi aur le lega, iss liye mujhe kuch samajh nahi aaya. Mujhe darr hai aap door ho jaayenge mujhse aur phir koi aur meri jagah le lega.”,she finished, and he stared at her face in astonishment.
(Lajjo's mother taught her everything before her marriage so she wouldn’t face problems. She told me to claim my rights as your wife, and Grandpa said I left home and someone else might take my place. So I was afraid you'd leave me, and someone else would take my place)
“Tumhe darr hai?”, he asked, surprised by her words. A sense of peace washed over him, her words revealing that she had accepted their marriage with her whole heart.
(You're afraid?)
She nodded, nervously chewing her lower lip.
“Ab meri baat dhyaan se suno aur darna bilkul mat, thik hai?” ,he said, and again she nodded, staring at their joined hands.
(Now listen to me carefully, and don't be scared, okay?)
He lifted her chin, making her meet his gaze, and spoke again, “Meri aankhon mein dekho, mai tumse kasam kha kar kehta hun, tumhari jagah koi nahi le sakta hai, tum meri biwi ho.”
(Look into my eyes, I swear to you, no one can take your place; you're my wife.)
She nodded, understanding, too overwhelmed to speak. He gathered the courage to share some truths that might disturb her.
“Maine dekha hai, tum bas itna mein hi darr gai…”,he paused, exhaling before continuing.
(I’ve seen that even this much made you afraid...)
“Tumhari ye body hai na, puri tarah se abhi develop ho gai hai chahe...par tum itni bahadur nahi ho ki mujhe jhel paao, tum samajh rahe ho na?”, he asked, and she hesitantly shook her head in confusion.
(Your body may be fully developed...but you're not strong enough to handle me, do you understand?)
“Abhi thodi derr pehle maine jo kiya...tumhe kaisa laga? Maine jab tumhe chua aur tumhare gardan par apna lams choda, aur phir jab maine tumhare honthon ko apne hothon se choone ki koshish ki tab.”, he gulped, repeating his actions, and continued, “Tumne apna muh mod liya, iska matlab kya hai, Halima?”
( Earlier, what I did... how did it feel? When I touched you, when I left my mark on your neck, and when I tried to kiss your lips——You turned your face away, what does that mean, Halima?)
Halima closed her eyes in shame and answered, “Humein sachme bohut darr lag raha tha..”
(I was truly scared...)
He nodded in understanding, gently explaining, “Darr laga kyuki sab log ke kehne par tum ye karna chahti ho. Logon ki sun kar mujhse ye haq mat maangna ab. Jab dil raazi ho, jab tumhe mujhse mohabbat ho jaaye, saara darr khatam ho jaaye tab kehna. Mai khushi khushi tumhare apni baahon mein bhar lunga. Jaha mohabbat hoti hai waha bharosa khud ba-khud aajaata hai. Darr ka toh koi jawaaz hi nahi hai.”
(You felt scared because you’re doing this based on others' words. Don't ask me for this right because of others. When your heart agrees, when you love me, and all fear vanishes, then ask. I'll happily hold you in my arms. Where there’s love, trust comes naturally. Fear has no place in it.)
She nodded, his words echoing in her mind. He was right; she had asked, but hadn’t known what to expect or how to react when he began doing that.
"Aapko pata hai, jaise aapka dil tezi se dhadak raha tha, waise hi mera bhi tha... mera jism sunn pad raha tha," she said, her voice soft but a bit more confident as she started to share her feelings with him.
(You know, just like your heart was racing, mine was too... my body felt numb.)
He nodded, looking at her with gentle reassurance. "Yakeen karo mujh par," he said. "Jis din darr khatam hua, uss din kuch nahi hoga. Khushi hogi tumhe sab mehsoos karke. Mohabbat hone ke baad, yahi lams tum baar baar mangogi, aur mai hamesha tumhare liye hazir rahunga. Filhal, inn saari cheezon se door raho aur padhai karo. Jab waqt aayega, toh tumhe kehne ki zarurat nahi padegi."
(Trust me. The day this fear ends, nothing will hold you back. You’ll feel happiness experiencing it all. After love grows, you'll crave this touch over and over, and I’ll always be here for you. For now, stay away from all this and focus on your studies. When the time is right, you won’t even need to ask.)
She cast a shy glance at his hand,he was right again because no one can be more eager than the man to break all the boundaries.
"Wada karo mujhse," he continued, lifting her hand to his lips and placing a gentle kiss on the back of her palm. "Meri dost ban kar rahogi hamesha. Shohar aur biwi ke rishte me dosti pehle honi chahiye. Aur hum dono ke beech jo bhi baat ya waisa ho, toh tum kisi ko nahi bataogi."
(Promise me... that you’ll always remain my friend first. Friendship should come first between a husband and wife. And whatever happens between us, you won’t tell anyone.)
She lowered her gaze, murmuring softly as she looked at their hands, “Ji, kabhi kisi se kuch nahi kahungi.”
(Yes, I’ll never tell anyone.)
He nodded, his body still tense as he moved towards the almirah, his thoughts weighed down by his actions. She watched him from behind as he took out the same clothes he had left there after his last bath,She washed his clothes.
He picked up a classic vest and put his clothes on table,and slipped vest on his body,the vest concealed his chest and back, leaving his arms and shoulders exposed.
“Aap jaa rahe hai?” she asked, standing up as she noticed his choice of clothes.
(Are you leaving?)
He turned and looked at her for a moment before replying, “Lag tho kuch waisa hi rha hai, tum kya chahti ho?”
(It does seem that way; what do you want?)
Raza's mind was filled with restless thoughts, and he was determined not to break the promises he had made to himself. For the first time, he realized how much strength it took to hold himself back from a woman, and that was why he wanted to go home. Spending the whole night here with Halima felt like walking a tightrope between desire and restraint, a path as treacherous as crossing a bridge of fire.
Hesitatingly, she walked over, took his clothes from him, and opened her almirah, placing them back inside. Her eyes met his as she shrugged, “Aapko pata hai pure gaav mein baat phaili hai ki baag aata hai raat mein. Main nahi chahti kuch ho aapko. Humari dosti aaj hi tho hui hai, raat bohut ho gai hai aap yahi so jaayein.”
(You know the whole village is saying there's a tiger that comes at night. I don’t want anything to happen to you. We’ve just become friends today, and it’s already late – please stay here tonight.)
He smiled and patted her cheek as if she were a child, and she rubbed it with a glare, slightly annoyed at the gesture.
"Jo hoga dekha jaayega, mehram hai meri; agar thoda behka toh kya hi ho jaayega. Biwi samajhdaar hai meri, samajh jaayegi. Allah, bas aaj ki raat acche se guzar jaaye, kal shukrana adaa kar dunga," he thought, unable to hold back a smile at himself.
(Whatever happens, let it be. She is my lawful wife; if I falter a little, what harm could it bring? My wife is wise; she will understand. Allah, just let me get through this night, and tomorrow, I’ll offer my gratitude.)
“Thik hai, aur haan mujhe nahi lagta main tumhe padha paaunga, aur main kyu padhaun? Raat ko thoda sa hi tho waqt milta hai tumhare saath guzaarne ke liye. Kal main Sir Sayyad mein jo Master Tariq hai na, unse baat kar leta hoon,” he said.
(Alright, but I don’t think I’ll be able to teach you myself. Why should I? The nights are all we get to spend together. Tomorrow, I’ll speak to Master Tariq at Sir Sayyad School.)
“Wo tho aapke Master ji the na?” she asked, walking towards the bed.
(Wasn’t he your teacher?)
“Haan, mere sabse pasandida hain wo. Unpar yakeen hai, aur wo tumhe acche se padha diya karenge roz din mein,” he replied, sitting beside her.
(Yes, he’s my favorite. I trust him, and he’ll teach you well during the day.)
She nodded, and they both fell into a comfortable silence for a moment.
“Bohut derr ho gai hai, so jaao,” he said softly, lying down beside her.
(It’s very late; go to sleep.)
Biting her lip in nervousness, she lay beside him, facing him. She closed her eyes, then turned around, replaying everything that had happened in her mind.
Minutes later, she felt his hand gently taking hold of her long braided hair, causing her to flinch slightly.
“Abhi bhi jaag rahi ho?” he asked, noticing her reaction.
(Still awake?)
“Aap bhi tho jaag rahe hain...” she whispered, breathing heavily as she felt his fingers slowly unweaving her braid.
(You’re still awake too...)
He just hummed in response, and once her hair was loose, he asked, “Kya main kareeb aasakta hoon?”
(May I come closer?)
Without turning, she reached back, grabbed his arm, and placed it around her waist. He smiled, moving closer until his face was just behind her head, inhaling the fresh scent of her hair.
“Kal mehndi lagwa lena. Mujhe tumhare haathon mein mehndi ki khushboo bohut pasand hai,” he murmured, recalling their wedding Night.
(Put on mehndi tomorrow. I love the fragrance of mehndi on your hands.)
She wrapped her hand over his arm and murmured drowsily, “Hmm… thik hai.”
(Hmm… okay.)
Hearing her sleepy response, he wrapped his arm around her more firmly and began to massage her scalp with his other hand. Feeling lighter and at ease, she soon drifted into sleep.
He pressed a gentle kiss to the back of her shoulder, then closed his eyes, letting sleep finally claim him as well.
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